The Everyday Woman -Part 6

Transcript

Everyday Woman – Part 6

[00:00:00] Rev. Michele Owes: All right, here we are. Welcome back to the Teachable Woman podcast. I am Reverend Michele Owes and

[00:00:12] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: I am Reverend Diana P. Cherry, and we are…

[00:00:16] Rev. Michele Owes: Teachers of Good Things. Yes. Excellent. We are Teachers of Good Things. We left our last session saying a wise woman builds her house. We indicated that we would come back and share that with you. Before we get there, I just want to comment that Mrs. Cherry is 80 years old and she is doing water aerobics daily five days a week, and she is doing Tai Chi.

[00:00:51] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: Yes.

[00:00:52] Rev. Michele Owes: And she goes to a strength and training class.

[00:00:56] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: Yep.

[00:00:58] Rev. Michele Owes: And I wanted to say this is a prime example of what we were talking about earlier in that we must respect ourselves, and care for ourselves. Move ourselves up on the list of to-dos because caring for us is important. As much as we care for others, caring for us is important because a healthier, better us makes a better life for everybody who is involved.

[00:01:30] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: Right.

[00:01:31] Rev. Michele Owes: You might be saying to yourself, well, Mrs. Cherry can do three exercise classes a day. She is eighty. I do not have that kind of time. I got stuff to do. That may be true as well, but we can do something.

[00:01:45] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: Yes, we can. And I am a busy 80-year-old. I just finished writing a book. I spent a lot of time on the computer. I have work to do, and I am working.

[00:01:57] Rev. Michele Owes: All right, so she is letting you know, she's not sitting around eating bonbons. She is getting the job done in this life and we are excited. But when you look at her exercise program and what she is doing, I'm just going to say don't mess with her because she's able to chase you down.

[00:02:16] Rev. Michele Owes: She will not be saying, hey, somebody, they took my purse. She is coming for that purse because she is ready. She is in great shape.

[00:02:27] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: I do my best.

[00:02:28] Rev. Michele Owes: But we, we want in the everyday woman, this, this, this section right here just burned in my heart. This is burdensome to me. The Scripture from Proverbs 14:1e, says every wise woman buildeth her house, but the foolish plucking it down with her hands. This is the Scripture that we [00:03:00] used in my very first retreat.

[00:03:02] Rev. Michele Owes: It was the foundational Scripture for the retreat. The things that God shared with us during that retreat were life-changing. And I would love to just pour, at this moment, share a few things with you. First, it must be a wise woman. In other words, we have put away childish thinking, and childish behavior. When we are willing to apply the word of God to our lives, that is what wisdom is.

[00:03:43] Rev. Michele Owes: Wisdom is the application of knowledge. It is the application of God's word in our lives that allows us to be a wise woman. [00:04:00] Natural example, with the old man, if someone got on my nerves, I would curse them out. But I am a wise woman now.

[00:04:06] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: Yes.

[00:04:07] Rev. Michele Owes: The word of God has taught me the value of silence.

[00:04:13] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: Yes.

[00:04:15] Rev. Michele Owes: I do not have to yell and scream and curse and say all manner of evil.

[00:04:22] Rev. Michele Owes: I can be silent and let God fight that battle. Even if I have been hurt by the comments, the treatment, or the attitudes of others, I don't have to lower myself to try to battle at the same level at which I was offended.

[00:04:45] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: Yes.

[00:04:46] Rev. Michele Owes: Because I'm a wise woman now, I'm applying the word of God to my life. I know that this tongue is but a small member, but it is deadly.

[00:04:58] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: Yes, I remember one time [00:05:00] sharing that your silence does not mean you consent. It does not mean that I agree with you. It does not mean that what you are saying, I approve of, but I choose to be silent.

[00:05:16] Rev. Michele Owes: So, wisdom is the correct application of knowledge, and the knowledge of God's word helps to shape us. I am going to say it this way. I do not know a man who wants to be cursed out. I do not know a man who wants to be belittled, whether he be your husband, brother, nephew, son, uncle, or father.

[00:05:43] Rev. Michele Owes: I do not know a man who wants to be demeaned. Whenever we find ourselves in that position, we tear something down. Right? To build a house, the first thing you must do is excavate the land. You have to clear the space. You must cut down the old trees. You must remove the grass that was growing.

[00:06:14] Rev. Michele Owes: You have to excavate the land. This ties back into Mrs. Cherry's discussion about righteousness. We must clear out those old things and those old ways that can destroy a life, a family, or a marriage.

[00:06:34] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: Yes.

[00:06:35] Rev. Michele Owes: When we become a wise woman, we will never take an opportunity to destroy God's creation with our tongue.

[00:06:46] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: Yes.

[00:06:48] Rev. Michele Owes: We will put that baby on pause and sometimes you just might have to slap your hand, put both hands over your mouth, and run out of the room just to get yourself together.

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[00:06:58] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: That is true.

[00:06:59] Rev. Michele Owes: But the damage that is done if we don't.

[00:07:00] I remember years ago, early in my Christian walk a man did an object lesson. It was about when we say things that are ugly and mean to others. He had a tube of toothpaste and he squirted it out on the table. And he said, once it is out, you cannot put it back in.

[00:07:21] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: Oh my!

[00:07:22] Rev. Michele Owes: He tried to scoop the little bit that he could, you know, play with the tube and push some more down, but you could never get it all back in.

[00:07:32] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: Right.

[00:07:33] Rev. Michele Owes: So, yes, when we offend, as much as we have talked about how fearfully and wonderfully made women are, I want you to know that God's man is equally as valuable to Him.

[00:07:52] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: Yes,

[00:07:53] Rev. Michele Owes: His role is powerful, and his role requires a

[00:08:00] wise woman who is willing to build him. Now when God talks about building, He is not just talking about the physical structure of a house. We are not even talking about the furniture you put in that house. None of that is really what this scripture is referring to.

[00:08:16] Rev. Michele Owes: God is saying that we must build the people that He entrusts us to know, to have relationships with, or to be exposed to because we are builders.

[00:08:31] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: Yes.

[00:08:32] Rev. Michele Owes: That means that we should be encouragers. It does not mean that we cannot tell the truth. But the truth always must be in love, or nobody will accept it.

[00:08:42] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: Yes, yes, yes.

[00:08:44] Rev. Michele Owes: I am going to give you another natural example. This is something that has shaped me my whole life. This was part of how I chose who would be in my life and who I would not. There was a family [00:09:00] friend who was a good friend of my dad's and I was getting ready to go to college. And my dad sent money to me through that person because I was babysitting for them at the time.

[00:09:10] Rev. Michele Owes: When they came back, it was time for me to go home and I was leaving, flying off to college the next day. And I wanted the money that my dad sent me. So, I asked the question, my dad said he sent money, did he? The person threw the money at me. Threw the money. This was a long-term family friend.

[00:09:36] Rev. Michele Owes: I had babysat for them for years. You could not have told me I was not like a second daughter. Fast forward 20-something years later, my dad says to me, so and so said that she never heard from you. You did not invite her to your graduations. You did not even send her an invitation.

[00:09:58] Rev. Michele Owes: You never even informed her that you were graduating. You all had had such a good relationship for so long. I told him what happened, and he was livid. He said you should have told me right then. Now, this action in one moment undid all those good years.

[00:10:24] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: My, my.

[00:10:25] Rev. Michele Owes: To me, it was so uncalled for.

[00:10:30] Rev. Michele Owes: It was sent to me. You happened to be the middleman. Why can't I have it? And, then why do you have to throw it at me? I know you could have been having a bad moment. Something else may have occurred in your life, but it was enough for me to know that I could not entrust her with the person that I was.

[00:10:55] Rev. Michele Owes: I was a teenager. I went to college at 16 years [00:11:00] of age and I had just turned sixteen. I knew if someone could treat me this poorly, in an instant, after so many years of labor, I could not trust my 16-year-old self with them.

[00:11:16] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: Hmm.

[00:11:18] Rev. Michele Owes: When my dad was going home to be with the Lord, she came to the hospital. The Word of God had shaped my heart and my mind. We hugged for the longest time because the offended 16-year-old had become a wise woman.

[00:11:42] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: Yes.

[00:11:43] Rev. Michele Owes: She had matured. She was able to forgive. She was able to understand that people have bad moments, but the 16-year-old me needed to choose who could speak into my life, and who could be in my life because she was fragile.

[00:12:02] Rev. Michele Owes: I could not afford a moment like that as a young woman. She could have built me up the night before I left for college. What do I know? Absolutely nothing. There were so many opportunities for it to be a good exchange, but it was not. And so that is how I chose to protect myself. I am saying that as a wise woman, God is trusting you to build the people in your life.

[00:12:36] Rev. Michele Owes: You have sons and daughters, build them. You have husbands, build them. You have brothers, build them. You have coworkers, build them. You get so much more out of the building process than the tearing down.

[00:12:50] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: Yes, for sure.

[00:12:52] Rev. Michele Owes: And that scripture says that she pulleth it down [00:13:00] with her own hands. In other words, you destroyed it all with your hands.

[00:13:03] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: Yes. Yes.

[00:13:07] Rev. Michele Owes: All right. I am almost done pouring, but I'm going to take a break. Jump in Ms. Cherry, wherever.

[00:13:23] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: We must choose to be good. And remember good has a beneficial effect. If what you are doing, thinking, or saying is not good, it is not going to have a beneficial effect because wisdom builds. One thing I have always said. Wise women are sorely lacking in the world today. I have said this since 1981 when we were called into the ministry. And I used to say, there are just not many gray-haired women of wisdom. Now I am a [00:14:00] gray-haired woman. So, my prayer is that I would be a gray-haired woman with wisdom. And when you have wisdom, you do build up, you do not tear down.

[00:14:09] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: You do not have a reason to tear down. Nothing hurts a person more than to be misjudged, or for someone to say that you did, or did not do something. Or that you said or did not say something. It is so unnecessary. It is so much easier and requires less energy to build rather than to tear down. I want us just to remember what I said in the last session. We must believe in our hearts that righteousness is what is best for us. We must believe that righteousness will cause us to build people. We must believe in our hearts [00:15:00] that the hope of God and the hope of the gospel is the long-term benefit of righteousness. The very hope of the gospel is the long-term benefit of righteousness. In all that you do, strive to be righteous. In all that you do, strive to be good. Have a beneficial effect. Do not allow your life to do to someone else's what that lady did to sister Owes. Be good. It is so much easier to be good than it is to be unkind and to be unfruitful. All of us must strive really to be good, to be good women, to be wise women, the world is full of so much foolishness.

[00:15:46] Rev. Michele Owes: Yes.

[00:15:47] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: And wise women are so scarce. So purpose in your heart that you're going to be wise, you're going to be good, you're going to have a beneficial effect wherever you go. You are going to take your life out [00:16:00] of the negative column and put it into a positive column. Make your life make a difference.

[00:16:06] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: You can do that.

[00:16:09] Rev. Michele Owes: Amen. I want to challenge us. I want to challenge us to take these just seven days, just seven days. Between the time you hear this podcast and the time you hear the next one and build. Watch how you speak to your husband. Make sure that it is with reverence and build him. I don't care if he left that toilet seat up, or didn't fold the clothes, or the towels right. Maybe he left the trash in the kitchen.

[00:16:40] Rev. Michele Owes: Build him.

[00:16:42] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: Yes,

[00:16:43] Rev. Michele Owes: I don't care if he was late picking you up from work. Build him.

[00:16:47] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: Yes.

[00:16:48] Rev. Michele Owes: Those sons, those daughters, that act like you're not even the parent anymore because they think they're grown in your house. I learned an interesting thing years ago. Someone said when you're [00:17:00] grown you have the last three letters of the word. You have your own, but if you are in this house, the grown part has not yet been achieved.

[00:17:06] Rev. Michele Owes: That's an aside but build them. Let them know what they can be. That's what God wants them to know what they can be in this world that He created with Him at the helm, leading and guiding them. Let them know that whatever sins, transgressions, mistakes have been made. if there's breath in their body, there's a Holy God who's able to forgive and still move forward.

[00:17:34] Rev. Michele Owes: Same way with friends, brothers, fathers, uncles, aunts, and cousins. Just take seven days and deal. Just take seven days and go and see if it doesn't change the world around you.

[00:17:54] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: Yeah. The atmosphere in the home will change.

[00:17:56] Rev. Michele Owes: Yes,

[00:17:57] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: The workplace will change just because

[00:18:00] you have a mean cantankerous boss, show him respect he you to do. Respect him as the male. They are our natural examples. Now, some of them don't act like it.

[00:18:15] Rev. Michele Owes: Yes, for sure.

[00:18:16] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: The fact is that is what God planned. So, be kind, be nice, build.

[00:18:23] Rev. Michele Owes: Yes, yes.

[00:18:28] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: The state that Sister Owes and I are in now, you don't ever want to look back over your life and have regrets about how you disrespected your husband. You know the position that we're in. We would love to have another opportunity just to have them hold our hands, or to just come up behind us in the kitchen while we're cooking and put an arm around us. So, your husband is your natural example.

[00:18:58] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: If he's not living up to the part, perhaps

[00:19:00] change your behavior.

[00:19:03] Rev. Michele Owes: Hmm. Mm hmm.

[00:19:04] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: Your change can affect others. We cannot change people, but our behavior can affect a change in people. So just be the best that you can be. And don't feel like we always must do it. I'm always the one. No, you're not. He's got to make as many adjustments to your nasty attitude as we have to their nasty attitudes.

[00:19:23] Rev. Michele Owes: Woo.

[00:19:23] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: You, be responsible for yourself.

[00:19:30] Rev. Michele Owes: Yeah.

[00:19:31] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: You don't have to always say something. Just be quiet. Just listen. They'll pay attention. They'll notice that you changed. The change in you can effect a change in them. But you cannot change them. So, love your husbands.

[00:19:48] Rev. Michele Owes: Yes. And

[00:19:50] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: Love your husbands, love, just love, love, love, love. Love will cover a multitude of sins.

[00:19:59] Rev. Michele Owes: It never fails. Yeah. Love never fails.

[00:20:00] Love never fails. Yes. I challenge us to think of what the child in us needs that's what we provide.

[00:20:16] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: M-mmm

[00:20:17] Rev. Michele Owes: Sure.

[00:20:19] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: Wow!

[00:20:22] Rev. Michele Owes: That 16-year-old needed something. And what could have been provided at that moment? What did the child in you need and use that to build up and make sure that you provide for others?

[00:20:39] Rev. Michele Owes: Mrs. Cherry! Our time! We are there again. What a beautiful opportunity to share with you that we have another opportunity to be wise women. Mrs. Cherry talked about the fact that we would love to have our husbands come and hold our hands and she went for the PG version.

[00:21:06] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: Of course, well, at my age holding hands was very important Yeah, you're a little bit younger than me

[00:21:16] Rev. Michele Owes: I will say this. You have an opportunity to build up and not tear down, whatever phase you're in. If there's breath in your body, even if you've gone through a divorce. You don't have to be cantankerous with the other person. Even if you never married, but you share children, you don't have to be the thorn.

[00:21:43] Rev. Michele Owes: You don't have to be the party pooper. Just be someone who builds.

[00:21:52] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: Right.

[00:21:52] Rev. Michele Owes: You would be amazed at what you can get out [00:22:00] of the deposit that you leave.

[00:22:01] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: Oh, yes. Yes. You know, I love this. When we were in the denomination, people were always coming up to us like we were stars or something. And I guess this little old lady detected it. And she said, Mrs. Cherry, don't ever call me again. Because, you know, we kind of inundate you all the time.

[00:22:20] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: She said, remember that light draws bugs. She said so you are drawing people to you because of the light that's in you. But I know it sounds terrible, but that's what she said. And

[00:22:42] Rev. Michele Owes: She wasn't calling them bugs. She was just letting you know that light draws. Yeah. Yeah.

[00:22:49] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: It will draw more than lemons. Lemons, people don't want, but honey will draw. So be nice. [00:23:00]

[00:23:00] Rev. Michele Owes: Yes. Be nice. Be a good woman. All right. Well, we love you. We are so excited about the opportunity that we've had to share with you, and we'll go into a little bit more detail. All right. We love you. Thank you for listening. Thank you for sharing the moments of your life with us. We are looking forward to what these seven days are going to mean in the life of your family, the life of your children, the life of your marriage, the life of your job, and your community.

[00:23:32] Rev. Michele Owes: We know you can do it. And even if you find that the old woman keeps showing up, just remind her that she's renewed in Christ Jesus. Get back on the horse and start again. Start building, start building, don't stop building, just keep building. If you fall off on day two, get back up and we do it again because the deposit that you make will far outweigh the moments that you fell off.

[00:23:54] Rev. Michele Owes: I want to remind you that fast-forward

[00:24:00] 20-something years later, the lady who so greatly offended me, we just hugged. We just loved it. The old moment was gone.

[00:24:09] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: Yes.

[00:24:10] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: Everyone, we can do it!

[00:24:11] Rev. Michele Owes: Yes, we can. Yes, we can. All right, we're going to say goodbye now. We love you.

[00:24:17] Rev. Diana P. Cherry: Bye-bye.